Where is the School of Love?

Why is it that something as love which is vital to human life as breathing, the ability to give and receive does not come to us naturally?

Rather, true love must be taught, learned and practiced. Humans spend many years as immature, dependent children who have to learn how to act in the world and then provide for themselves.

Schools, teachers, masters of trades and parents teach them skills, but there is no formal school or system that teach people how to love and be loved.

Left without instruction on the proper way to love centered on God, people are left floundering, having to learn about love through painful trial and error.

We have witnessed science and the arts flourish rapidly throughout the centuries, yet our wisdom about love and relationships grows slowly at best and unevenly.

Pitirim Sorokin, a sociologist at Harvard, expressed his chagrin at “our enormous ignorance of love’s properties, of the efficient way of its production, accumulation, and distribution.”

We are living the era to remedy all the love ails by studying about and educating for true love.

Even though to love and be loved properly is one of life's most daunting challenges =, it is essential more than any other aspect of life people work hard to achieve.

Psychiatrists have been visited by high-powered professional people who break down in their offices because they are at a complete loss when it comes to their most important personal relationships. 

Despite all of their qualifications and accomplishments politicians, business executives and celebrities find that their wealth, power and talent fail when they are faced with the demands of love.

Therefore, to study the true way of life begins with a life lived in true love. Only after people are well-versed in the nature and practices of true love will they find a path to follow that will satisfy the human longing for true love.

The most precious philosophy is to live for the sake of others.

—Sun Myung Moon

For people to live in love, they need to understand it.

It is utterly difficult to define love.

The ancient Greeks divided love into different categories, describing features of each.

For example, 'eros' was an impassioned romantic attraction; 'eunoia' stood for general benevolence or good will; 'xenlike' represented kindness to the guest or stranger; and 'agape' love which defined as an unselfish affection for others. 

Agape love became a keystone of Christianity. It is recognized by all the faiths of the world. Buddhism calls agape love 'compassion', Hinduism and 'human-hearedness' or jen in Confucian thought.

Additionally, there are all kinds of love found within the family:

There is devotion of parents toward their children, the children's affection which is reciprocated. Siblings care about one another in a unique special way, and there is the love between spouses which is a world in itself.

Grandparents have a profound regard for their grandchildren.

All these types of love have their distinct features.

There should be an all-around definition for love that encompasses all types of loves and form.

Reverend Moon states that true love is to live for the sake of other people. Within this definition, love that is not true is weeded out. Love that is deceptive and lead people to despair rather than joy are left out when defining what true love is.

True love is other-centered.

Why was humanity necessary?

We were created to completely fulfill His love. Love is the reason that humanity are the supreme creation.

True love only happens in relationship to others. Even God required an 'other' in order to fulfill His love.

God created humanity as His love partners who will share in the glory of His creation.

Even though God is almighty, He needed an object, someone to share in the creation with. God also needs a relationship in order to experience love fully.

If God is so, so must be His creatures.

As author Sherwood Anderson said, “Two oddly sensitive human atoms” find one another, cling together and think, “Here is this other.”

A love that satisfies is only possible when in the presence of another person. The Bible emphasizes the love others in the presence of others. The Old Testament testifies to the greatest commandments which were to love God and love one's neighbor as one loves themselves.

Jesus echoed this truth by telling his followers to not come to the altar of God if they quarrel with their brother in their heart. They had to set things right between their 'brother' before approaching God.

Jesus later pronounced that God only forgives those who forgives others.

Jesus told his people that when two or more were gathered in his name he would be present. He was implying the need for believers to seek communion not only with God, but with one another as well.

Loving others is always in couplet with loving God well.

The prophet Muhammad stated that on the day of judgment, God the most high will say, “Son of Adam, I was sick and you did not visit Me.” 

The son replied how could he visit the Lord when he was the Lord of the Universe. God replied, “Did you not know that My servant such and such was ill and yet you did not visit him? Did you not know that if you had visited him you would have found Me with him?”

Russian thinker Vladimir Solovyov said that love “forces us with all our being to acknowledge for another the same absolute central significance which, because of the power of our egoism, we are conscious of only in our selves . . . shifting the very center of our personal lives.”

Reverend Moon refers this shifting of center from self to others as a 'revolution'. He holds that such a revolution toward true love is necessary for happiness and peace in the world.

Modern culture says that love is a spontaneous feeling within a person's heart toward one another when in fact, ethics figure prominently in successful and loving relationships.

Upon further examination, it is shown that ethics enable true love and love that is based on feelings alone is dangerous.

If a man feels that he has truly fallen in love with another woman, he will leave his wife and children for her. He will leave emotional devastation in his wake in the pursuit of false feelings.

A teacher may feel that they are romantically attracted to a young student and end up causing psychological damage to the student for life when they approach them sexually.

Psychologist M. Scott Peck points out, “Many, many people possessing a feeling of love and even acting in response to that feeling act in all manner of unloving and destructive ways.”

In order to benefit the other, true love adheres to ethical principles.

Even though a truly loving person does not feel benevolent feelings toward another person, he will behave benevolently to someone based upon principles.

Such a person will be kind to a spouse even when the other is being surly because the person believes in kindness even when the other is not evoking such feelings.

Such a person believes in preserving and protecting marriage itself.

A person who helps a homeless man on the street is a person who believes in treating one's fellow human beings with compassion even if society does not see such a person as reputable.

To love a person who has harmed others means having a belief that all people can be redeemed, including the reprobate.

Return for Tomorrow’s Post: True Love is ...




This post was rewritten and derived from the religious textbook, Educating for True Love, Chapter 1 written by a team of writers to explaining Dr. Rev. Sun Myung Moon's thoughts on morality, society and Family.

Life of Faith Toughest School

If you say that a school is good, usually it has an intense and demanding curriculum.  Religious life can be compared to going to school. Do you want to join a very simple, easy-going religion?

Members of other churches go to church Sunday morning and sit on cushioned seats. All they have to do is write out their contribution card and tithe weekly, and that's it. But here you have to raise funds. Some of you have been kidnapped by deprogrammers. There are incredible differences.



Reverend Sun Myung Moon


Of course a person that is healthy is able to digest things that a sick person would not be able to handle.  By the same token, when you have a healthy mind, you, also, can digest anything: democracy, communism, and any philosophy.

Which -ism do you think a movement such as this belongs?  Godism.  Also, Unificationism, which is concerned with uniting things.

Is it easy to unite things?

We each have five senses, plus the limbs, and the beauty of each component comes from its harmony with the whole.  The eyes do not say, "I do not want to belong to that community.  I want to be all by myself."

Even nature observes such laws of the Principle while humanity has turned away from it through choice.

Here, we have five different colors of skin coming from all different parts of the world.  Our goal is to unite them into one family of man.

This church-life of fundraising, witnessing and working around the world for world restoration is complex.

We are into boat building, the fishing industry, and later we will go to the deep mountains digging miles into the earth for minerals.  What are the goals through pushing members into these incredible experiences?

You are being made into people who cannot be defeated.  That is people who are so capable that there is no one who can keep up with you.

Through this difficult training, you are learning how to totally digest many ways of living.  Through the hardships and incredible experiences, you will become great teachers whom people ask for advice.

Then our question boils down to one central point: Is there a God?

We broke down in three previous points how the theory of evolution leaves out God in the answer to the origin of the universe.

Ultimately, our question boils down to one central point: Is there a God?

There are two contrasting "blocs" in our world today.

The two worlds are the democratic world, also called the free world, and the other is the communist world. There are a few basic differences.

People of the free world assert that all of creation began with a thought, through the invisible world of the mind, or God.  The communists on the other hand insist that matter is the essence of everything, and thought is formed from matter.

This is the fundamental difference between them.

However, because of the communistic influence that has captured the world, many people in the free world are not aware of the existence of the mind, or spirit because it cannot be seen.

When such a person gets up in the morning they know that they need warm clothing because it is cold, they don't need spirit.

If they could choose an overcoat, they would like mink or sable.  Is it easy to obtain high-quality, expensive things or is it difficult?

If God does exist in the universe, then He would be important to the existence of the creation.  But if this God was only good for fulfilling the external daily requirements such as meals and necessities, what kind of God would He be?

If God was on a mountain, He would not only be on the highest mountain, He would be at the peak of that mountain.  If there was a tree there, God would be at the very top of that tree.

Is it easy to find and discover God?  If God has hidden himself on the earth, if He dwelt in the desert, He would look for the largest desert, like the Sahara.  This is how we reason.

If God was in the midst of the Sahara, even though many people have died along the way in search of Him, there would be many other people who will never stop searching to find Him.

God is that precious.

If He is the most precious thing, and you knew you can find Him in the desert, would you like to go there?  Even if it was at the risk of your lives?

This is the way human nature is.

If God is at the highest point of the mountain, people would not stop climbing up until they reach that pinnacle.

That is the way man is created.  If He was hidden in a cave miles beneath the earth, men will dig and dig and not give up until they reach Him.  This is what man's spiritual nature is inclined to achieve.

Why is that?

While man is in the process of reaching that highest, deepest and widest point, we overcome everything in between.  Once we finally reach the top we become conquerors. Thinking men always feel they want to conquer something which ordinary people do not reach.

It is mans spiritual nature to reach and strive for the utmost.

Would God place Himself where it was easy or difficult to reach?  God would be at the pinnacle, where people could ultimately reach Him through an extraordinary way.  What place are we?


I really want to give people the most precious thing under the sun. Then should I devise a way of life which is easy to live? Or should it be a path full of overwhelming experiences?  Everyone wants to get a Lincoln, if possible, instead of a Ford or Chevrolet. The most beautiful car is the easiest thing to create in the factory, right? No, the most expensive car requires the most care to make.


A lot of investment, extra effort and all kinds of tests went into making a car.

People who buy cars do not think about how difficult it was to build;they just simply enjoy the car.  Even though one created the automobile and wants to ride it, the owner would tell him that he does not belong there.

But, if his car breaks down, who will he need?  He will need an auto mechanic.

The well-dressed rich man who bought the car and the oily mechanic are both connected to that automobile.  What does this analogy mean for us as people of faith?

Would you want to be the passenger in the expensive car, or would you like to be the dirty, oily laborer who made the car?  Anyone can get dressed up and sit in a nice car, but not everyone can create a car from nothing.


Dumb Reverend Moon took the difficult road instead of the easy one, becoming the dirty mechanic. The mechanic who had the ability to create the expensive car has nothing to worry about. If the car breaks down, he can fix it. Even if there isn't a car, he can create one. He has confidence in himself.


Many Americans are proud of the Empire State Building and the once World Trade Center and so forth, but who built them?  Who designed them?

The Trade Center was designed by Japanese and built by the unwealthy.  Americans are proud of such structures, but are they able to build them on their own?

Even if your ancestors were great, working hard to build the things America is now proud of, what abut you?

Descendants of many great people do not care about such things and rather go clubbing and just enjoy life dancing and having a good time.  What can they be proud of other than that?

Young people today are going after fun with no purpose in life. 

No matter how great their past may have been, these young people will decline.

The children of those who had built such great monuments should be able to do something even greater and bigger to leave for the next generations.  Thus, the nation and people will be able to prosper.  We pledge to be people who will be purposeful and prosper.

We shall be the remnant.

Father speaks about growing up in North Korea and the process of activities that work toward restoring the ideal world:

I was born deep in the mountain country of Korea in a little house. I talked about mankind, the universe, and salvation of the nation. My parents thought I must be crazy.

They said, "You are the son of humble peasants.  Think about how to take care of the fields, how to raise the animals."

People around there couldn't comprehend the things that the little boy was talking about, so they said I was a crazy child, and when I became a little older, they said I was a crazy young man, then a crazy adult.

That crazy boy grew up to be a crazy man, then came to the United States, and is still talking about crazy things. I act like a crazy person. People look at me and say that something must be wrong with my brain.

Recently I have been saying that America cannot afford to have Jimmy Carter as President for another four years. Attacking Carter was almost like hitting a stone wall with my own fist. Who would get hurt?

Even if my hand got hurt, I wouldn't stop. But finally the stone wall gave in.

From the average person's point of view, my ideas are a little crazy. You are the followers of that crazy man. Amazing, though you aren't bothered by being called crazy men and women. You became so crazy that you gave up drugs, gave up discos, and you stopped any promiscuous behavior. You are liberated from that.

We are looking at the entire world and are trying to do something about its problem. If I tell you to gather on the East coast, you hop into vans and drive all day and night, and in three days you are all here. If one driver's eyes keep closing, someone else will open his eyes and drive.

Do you think I am so dumb that I don't know anything about these realities? You fundraising members, for example, go out into the streets every day and people yell at you and spit at you. Sometimes you are even shot at.

The best attitude is to go do fundraising as a researcher who is studying the people who hate Moonies. I am also researching all the fundraising members. I push you out, and in the meantime I study what kind of person you are.

The material fundraising members get to study is the extraordinary treatment they receive.

Some are kicked, some are stabbed, and some are hit. I want to see these records. What makes the men and women who can withstand this remain committed to their purpose?

People do not like to suffer, even for themselves, but here my fundraising people are suffering for the sake of others. Not a single benefit comes to them, but they are doing it for the sake of others and for the sake of the world. This is either extremely bad or extremely good; it cannot be in between.

Certainly I don't enjoy tribulation.

I would much rather go to an easy church. But I discovered that an easy path was not going to bring the solution. An extraordinary route had to be found, and I found it.

Once I found that route, I asked you to go all the way and not give up. Do it until it is finished. What you are doing now is becoming dirty, oily car-makers. You have started to build an automobile, so don't stop in the middle; go all the way.

Your fundraising record will remain.

People will recognize your deeds and your certificate will come. Later, a signature will be placed on that certificate, acknowledging you as a master in your field of fundraising, for instance, and then you become a teacher. When you complete a most beautiful car and then you drive it, nobody will say anything critical to you.

Would you rather build a 1981 Lincoln Continental, or buy one from a dealer?

If you build one, when you drive it you are not just driving a car. You are demonstrating what you are and you can be proud of yourself. But if you only talk about your idea and never carry it out, no one will trust your word.

You may buy a car and be proud of it, but people will say that you are just being snobbish, that you really have no right to be proud. But, when you make it and drive it, then you can be proud of your accomplishment and no one will say anything.

The basic difference between you and me is that you would prefer to buy a car from the dealer while I would rather build the car myself. The Unification movement is like that car. I can be proud of it and no one can say I am taking too much credit.

However, I am still working on this car because I haven't gotten the certificate yet from the US government, for example. But eventually the certificate will be processed and the signature will be put on, and then I will proudly testify and proclaim it to the people. Then they will say they are ready to hear me.

My ambition is to make each one of you my coworkers in the factory. Are you the auto buyer, or a coworker? That means you want to get down to work, don't you? Doing this hard work means being disciplined, pushed and taught. As the foreman of the factory, I will not compliment you too much.

I will always discipline and criticize you instead. This is the only way I can make you into top-notch workers. I want to push you so hard that no one is able to compete with me. I want all customers to agree that the best automobile comes from the Moon factory. Would you like that reputation?

The same principle is being applied to boat making. I told our people to make the best boat under the sun, but to make it the cheapest. The only way they can do that is by sacrificially giving themselves. But through this process the most beautiful boat is created, and no one else has a boat that can compete.

With the same spirit we make a society, a nation. If we Moonies make the best kind of nation for the cheapest price, there won't be room for communism to creep in."


Return for Tomorrow's Post: Become Ideal People for Liberation


This Post was rewritten from the speech Things That Are Important to You

The Family is the Workshop of Love

Each night you know where your husband is, but would you feel happy each morning and embrace each person as much as you embrace your husband?

If so, then truly you are developing an ideal home and everyone will win the position of king and queen of love.

Any wife who demonstrates such harmony and unselfish love in her husband's home will become the queen of that house because everyone will practically worship her.

Is this a universal principle, or just an opinion?

Anyone who violates this principle will crumble, not the person who lives by it.

The ideal house is a house where the most loving person becomes the central figure. 

He will create a palace of love.

Why did God prepare the relationships of parents and children, and husband and wife?

Because they are miniatures of the universe, in which each person can practice how to love the whole universe. If you become a perfect member of your family, all you have to do is expand your love and the whole universe will be your home.

The home is the fundamental unit to practice loving everything in the universe. When you graduate in family love, you can build a universal home.

With this outlook, a man sees a beautiful young lady as his sister instead of thinking dirty thoughts.

It is good if they have pure fellowship all night in that case. With this realization a husband and wife can trust each other deeply, and there will be no misunderstanding whenever one of them meets someone else.

The family is a unit that serves as an instructional manual to teach you how to love the universe. 

If you meet the family's criteria, then you have met the universe's criteria.

The Kingdom of Heaven in heaven is the place where men and women will live who served all mankind as their brothers and sisters and who made a home where true love was practiced.

It is a satanic act for men and women to try to limit or regulate the flow of love.

Anyone who violates this principle shall be judged in accordance with it. The family God gives you is your workshop for loving the rest of the world. If you practice that, then you have the qualification to enter heaven.



If your husband has unselfish love for humanity, then when you love him you are loving the world; then you are not receiving just one man's love but a much greater love. This is precisely Mother's position. I am in a position to be loved by many women from all parts of the world.



When Mother sees that and rejoices over it, her own position is increased. Then she can receive my love more, and the love of the people will flow to her as well. In that case she is becoming a greater woman who is entitled to receive the love of the entire world.

When you apply the principle I am describing this morning, and expand your love through loving your family, you are loving all mankind and the world. It works both ways.

The home is a workshop of love. 

By knowing how to love your grandparents, you know how to love all the old people of the world. By loving your brothers and sisters, you know how to love all the young people of the world. When you love your husband, that is how you can love all the men of the world.

In the miniature world of your home, there are all kinds of personalities.

Some of them may be sharp and critical, but if you know how to love them then you can love all people like that in the world. You might complain that you have to live with such stingy, pushy brothers and sisters, but by having that opportunity you will know better how to love the negative people of the world.

The home is a training ground of love.

Eventually, you can conquer not just the world but the entire spirit world and God Himself with this kind of standard. When you throw out many fishing lines baited with love, you can catch the whole world on your hooks.

The greatest catch will be God.

When you reel Him in, He will embrace you and cry out, "My child!" The ideal house is the fishing hole where you can catch all kinds of fish, including spirit world and God.

Normally you catch fish with a hook, which hurts the fish, but when you catch someone with a hook of love he won't feel pain but joy, even if you hook him in the eye.

Those who dwell in the ideal home are ideal men and women because they have this unselfish principle of love. When you enter an ideal house, the woman's eyes are filled with love; her nose is a lump of love and even her hair is full of love.

On every side you perceive love.

Do you want that? Is it easy or difficult to practice? Even though it is difficult, when you know the preciousness of love you have energy to do it. Shall we start practicing that love today?

Love unites a separated husband and wife, and heals separations between children, between the nation and the world and the universe. Love has such power.

Shall we live that way of life?

Wouldn't you protest that it is too difficult to do?

Even though you have an urge to complain, knowing that love will come as the fruit of practicing this way of life you will not have one moment to complain because you will be filled with great joy and enthusiasm.

Are we the enemy or hope of America?

How much hope? It is gigantic. There is so much hope here that eventually all Americans will swallow that hook. Once you know this dramatic way of life, in the morning you feel gigantic power and excitement. Without it you feel dead.  If you have it, then you are the hope of America.


I just returned from Korea, where the President was just assassinated and the entire country is trembling.  Because I am a symbol of hope for many people around the world, they were more concerned about my well-being than about events in Korea. Were you concerned? Why? Because you were worried that the hook of love might be taken away from you. When I go to Korea, your heart goes to Korea. When I go to Britain, your heart goes there.


Everything that lives off of sunlight will turn toward the direction of the sun.  No one has to be taught this; plants are not taught this either.  Everything just automatically turns to face the sunlight.

You have never heard of a minister giving a ten-hour, or even two or three-hour sermon because no one would stay that long. But when Father talks for hours, when he's finished, you wonder where the time went and keep asking for more. Why?

You are hooked with love.

All five races are joined here in the exciting task of building the ideal home.

That is not my home or your home but God's home, in which all are entitled to dwell. We are joined together here for tomorrow's victory in the fulfillment of the ideal home. A new ideology has come which will bring a heightened hope and civilization.

We want to create God's ideal home. Would you make it the kind of place God goes only reluctantly, or the place where He is excited to go?

A place where God is uncomfortable and sits in a corner watching everyone, or where He moves around everywhere with complete freedom?

When you are persecuted and struck, think that you must be able to withstand it so you can make a home where God has complete freedom. Then it is not painful but exciting to receive persecution.

When other people curse you, then remember that you should be able to embrace even these men and women and tame them so God's home will be more exciting.

Then persecution tastes exciting. Then you are a public person.

We want to make a home so exciting that if you tell God He has to go back He will beg you to be able to stay.

Those who would make that house, raise your hands.

Would you complain? Would you get discouraged? Who can say they will live up to this new expectation?

Thank you.

Return for Tomorrow's Post: Pour Your Heart Out for Others

This post was rewritten and derived from the speech Ideal Home

Sex Education Focus on Purity

When you are nearing twenty, where do you take your clean and unstained pure love, carefully wrapped? To the altar of God, the place where Heaven will be most happy to receive it. Then you join with a man of pure love or a woman with pure love to become a holy husband and wife together.

—Sun Myung Moon



Those who have kept up with the post or are familiar with Unification Thought and the teachings of the Divine Principle, you will recognize a common underlining theme in each one.

Reverend Dr. Sun Myung Moon made it his life mission to speak about reversing the fallen history and what he had learned in his 90 years in search of the ultimate way to completely be rid of humanity's sinful fallen lineage.

In short, humanity's wrong turn began with the wrong use of love through the sexual organs and in his quest he found that to reverse this is through connecting our love to God and our sexual organs only between husband and wife.

For the next week, we will focus on this part of the teaching.

Many think that a pastor should not bring up the topic of sex, but God created sex to be abundant and enjoyed between a husband and wife.  Because sex education is not being taught in the home or in the church's, Satan has been teaching his ungodly way of sex.  It is time to reclaim this holy part of the body and return it to God.

Here Father Moon gives a speech on the topic:


"When children are young, the joy of their lives is in seeing their parents’ faces. Next comes the deep attachment they develop with their siblings and friends.

But as they begin to turn into young men and women, they become intensely fascinated with the other sex, and the longing for conjugal love rises in their hearts. This is the “urge to merge” with a mate and become more complete, the longing for oneness in heart and body with their life companion, to team up with a partner to impact the world in a greater way.

These developments are a direct call of the four realms of heart and are necessary to a life fulfilled in true love. Traditionally, parents and indeed their whole society guided young people along a clearly defined path to meet a mate and come into marriage.

Centuries ago in the West and presently in parts of the East, elders arranged marriages while youth were yet teenagers. In the modernized world not long ago, individuals dated to select their own mate for marriage. In either case, sexual love was expected to be reserved for marriage.  Presently, however, these ways have become all but lost.

Dating is no longer with the intent to marry, but simply to have fun and companionship.

In fact, there are few clear rules or guidelines to help steer couples to the altar. Sex has become an expression of casual interest with little connection to marriage.

It is indulged in at earlier and earlier ages; 16 is a common age to lose virginity in most Western countries. Parenthood is no longer related to marriage and the widespread use of contraceptives and abortion intends to sever sex from parenthood as well.

A “divorce culture” in which a high percentage of first marriages fail has broken young people’s confidence to marry and adult confidence to advocate it. This plus the lack of stigma attached to sex outside of marriage has led to the widespread practice of couples living together before or in place of marrying.

Perhaps to an unprecedented degree, a multitude of powerful forces conspire against young people keeping the tradition of giving their bodies and souls to one person for life. Yet this remains the standard imprinted in the heart and conscience by the Creator.

For what reason do we marry? It is in order to realize the purpose of [human] creation.”

Nothing else can satisfy individuals’ yearning to live a life of honor and significance, to be loved unconditionally and to give their children the security of their parents’ enduring unity.


Desirable and Attainable?

To conform to this norm requires youth and single people to believe in the value and viability of both purity and marriage. Just as importantly, they need to believe in their own capability to be successful in each enterprise.

On one hand, they need to be sold on the beauty of reserving sex for marriage. One young woman sums up her sense of this when she writes, “It is sexuality dedicated to hope, to the future, to marital love, to children, and to God.”

At the same time, confidence that they personally can practice it is essential. This is not easy in many societies given the dearth of role models to look up to.

On the other hand, the idea of saving sex for marriage only has meaning if they view matrimony as desirable. More pointedly, they must see it as an attainable goal for themselves. When so many in society model marital failure, it is common to find individuals who doubt they can succeed in marriage:

“I want to be married, but most people I know have divorced or given up on it. I don’t know how I could do better.” In such cases, they may well decide to give up their chastity and dreams of marriage for a live-in lover, the closest thing to marital  commitment they believe they can achieve.

For these reasons, helping young and single people to be responsible regarding their sexual desires and to achieve the life purpose of marriage requires support for both goals. This support may encompass many facets—from basic relationship insights and skills to inner qualities and the lessons gleaned from family relationships to considering practical issues of when and how to meet a potential mate.


Education for Character, Abstinence and Marriage Preparation 

Guiding young people into matrimony and safeguarding their chastity is a multi-faceted endeavor involving many overt and subtle contributions from the family and community.

The disruption of traditional culture in the developed countries has left in many cases a profound vacuum that leaves adolescents and young adults with an unprecedented lack of assistance in this critical task. Families and societies have adapted in some measure to meet the need.

The most noticeable developments have been the rise of education for character, sexual abstinence and more recently, the emergence of marriage and relationship education.

Character education has been a rising trend in many societies.  Whether in elementary school or at the university, whether in a secular or parochial setting, intentional character education aims to bolster the moral development of students and foster emotional and social learning.

Methods include bringing out the ethical dimensions of classroom instruction, creating a more caring school community, conducting service learning projects and utilizing cooperative learning techniques.

Many view character education as a socializing influence that promotes better interpersonal relationships, including those between the sexes.

Formal education about sexuality has been a growing trend worldwide, especially with the proliferation of sexually transmitted infections. 

Much of this, however, is focused on control of the physical consequences of sexual relations, not primarily the support of purity. In response, what is called abstinence education has emerged.

Whether offered in a secular or faith-based setting, this is formal, research-based instruction characterized by an emphasis on reserving physical intimacy for marriage. Nations as diverse as the United States, Uganda and India have supported this effort with government funding.

The last thirty years has witnessed an explosion of scientific understanding about what makes marriages succeed and fail. This has been translated into programs imparting certain knowledge and skills that are supplementing the traditional premarital guidance offered in faith and family settings to great effect.

For instance, in cities where judges and clergy agree to conduct marriages only for couples who have received premarital education and counseling, divorce rates have dropped dramatically.

They are also increasingly being offered in schools and other contexts. In the United States, several states and cities have mandated marriage education for all high school students, and such courses for personal enrichment are increasingly common on college campuses. The hallmark of such programs is training in better communication skills and greater facility in dealing with conflict



Complementary Education

The three kinds of education are naturally complementary and interdependent. The most effective abstinence programs incorporate marriage and relationship education, just as the most comprehensive relationship education cautions against physical intimacy outside of the context of commitment. This burgeoning formal instruction in the understanding and skills needed for sexual abstinence and marriage preparation is of great value.




Three Facets of Marriage Preparation

Yet for Reverend Moon, there are other components of chastity and marriage support that are equally if not more important. We may consider the great religious traditions and their appeal to and cultivation of personal character. There are also the lessons gained and the wholesome influence of personal relationships with elders, youngers and peers. This is where character education has an important role to play.

Finally there is the question of the age of entering into marriage and parentally involved mate selection; these represent yet another facet of depth and power. If these various facets can be likened to

Parental Involvement in Mate Selection
Right Age of Marriage
Relational
Knowledge
Skills
Character
Enriching
Relationships

Olympic medals, knowledge and techniques alone represent the bronze medal level. This combined with character and family relationships compares to the silver medal status. If parentally involved mate selection and right marital timing are added, this represents the highest, gold medal level



Return for Tomorrow's Post: 7 Days of Holy Sex Day 1: Significance of Sex

This text was rewritten and derived from the Textbook: True Love, Chapter "Purity and Preparation for Marriage"

The Family is the School of Love

"The Kingdom of Heaven is a world of love, a world that exists for the sake of God, where people live for the sake of God." 

"The family is an encapsulation of history. It is connected to history, with its origin in God. You inherit the family vertically. However, inheritance must take place in a perfectly vertical manner, at a ninety degree angle.

The grandfather and grandmother, representing God, have already inherited this." 

Your grandfather and grandmother are the encapsulation of your ancestors.  When you think about it, your grandfather is an heir to the traits and bloodline of all the different ancestors who lived at different times in history.  Then he is God's heir who, centered on God, connects us to that history.

The family unit encompasses all of human history.  It connects to history with its origin in God.

The grandfather and grandmother are representatives of the past, the bygone ages, and the mother and father represent the present age. The sons and daughters represent the future. 

Therefore, your grandfather and grandmother are the past, your mother and father are the present and the children are the future.  Then when it is our turn to have children we inherit the past, present and future and pass this down to another generation.  These three set of parents and three ancestors must connect their three loves and love the four generations.

The Fall represents God not being able to see or have a direct relationship with His grandson.

The Kingdom of Heaven starts from the family. 

How is this?  The grandfather represents God, the mother and father represent the present, and the sons and daughters are the future. In this way, the past, present, and future are all condensed in the family.

In the family, the grandfather represents God, the mother and father represent the present and the children the future.  In this way, the past, present and future are all in your family.

Thus, the mother and father represent the world, with the grandmother and grandfather in the position of the past God, the mother and father the present God and sons and daughter are in the position of the future God.

However, through true love, they are all equal.

When the central core is living for the sake of others in true love, they are able to develop a view of essential oneness and equal value.  When the four different directions meld into one, we will be able to live eternally as God's love partner based on this logic of true love because that place is eternally protected by the fortune of God's love.

What is the family? It is a training ground through which we can inhabit the ideal nation and world with love. Furthermore, it is a training ground through which we can even occupy the heavenly kingdom and God.

Wouldn't it be precious to experience the direct relationship with God as our love partner?  Right now only through the Messiah or aid of angels do we communicate with God, but we must return to the state of Adam and Eve before the Fall.

The reason we seek the truth is so we can perfect our families and feel infinite love and happiness when we are there.

If we have not given true love here on this plane, we will choke once we are in spirit world - they will not be able to breathe.  Only true love is the air.  We are to live our earthly life as a training ground that prepares us to breathe in the next world.

Your family is the textbook of love. 

When you see someone of your grandfather's age, you should think that you will love him even more than your own grandfather. 

When you are out in town and you come upon someone who is your grandfather's age, you should think to love him even more than your own grandfather.

The same with if you come upon someone who is the same age as your father or mother, you should welcome him or her whether he is black or white or of a different nationality.  When you see a young person, you should love and relate to them as if they are your own son or daughter.

Imagine a world full of men and women who think of others in this context.

What is the Kingdom of Heaven?

It is the place where you can love the people of the world as you love your family, and such people are the people of the heavenly kingdom. What do the four generations of your grandfather and grandmother, your mother and father, your wife, brothers and sisters, and your children make up? 

It is a place full of people who love strangers as if they were a member of their own family.  Such people are people of the heavenly kingdom.


There are four generations in your family. The grandfather/grandmother, your mother/father, your wife/husband, brother/sisters and your children.  What do they make up?

They make up your family which is a textbook how to relate to the people of the world with true love of the universe as a person of the heavenly kingdom.  This family textbook is the foundation in which you receive such a teaching.

God's love manifests itself in the things of creation. 

Parental love appears in children.  Also, where there's a husband, the wife's love will appear, just as when we can witness the parents' love by looking at their children or seeing the wife's love by looking at the state of her husband's clothes.

What about God?  We can see His love by looking at the things that He created in this world for His children you and me. 

God's love appears in order: First is parental love, next comes conjugal love, children's love and then the love of brothers and sisters.  This is also known as the Four-Position foundation centering on the love of God which creates the kingdom of heaven on earth.

If you only have love, then you can be friends with God and also have him as our Father.

There is a saying that earthly life is just a journey and we are just travelers.  During this journey, we should strive to experience vertical and horizontal love.  After creating a family based on the love of true parents, husband and wife, true brothers and sisters and true sons and daughters, we should expand this foundation on the horizontal plane throughout all families in all directions.  

Then this model of a true family should be expanded to the tribe, nation and world level.  Then this world of true love will connect to God and we call this the Kingdom of Heaven.

God's love opens the gate of salvation.

We must inherit God's true love, true life and true blood lineage which we lost due to the Fall.  We should know that there is no salvation of mankind without this inheritance.  

The worst of all sins is to break something and scatter the pieces in all different directions.  The worst and most hated of all enemies is one that has destroyed love.  There is no devil as bad as the one that causes children to despise their parents and destroys a couple's relationship keeping them from loving one another as husband and wife.

Because of the Fall of our first human ancestors, we first lost brother and sister's love, then conjugal love, then lastly children's love. Without restoring this lost love, we cannot enter the Kingdom of Heaven.

Due to the Fall we lost the four-position foundation: we first lost brother and sister love, then conjugal love, then lastly children's love. This four position begins in the family which we learn how to relate with the world centered on God.

Imagine going to the local cafe and being able to sit with any family of your chose which you never met before and speak to one another like brothers and sisters.  Without having true love as a possession, we will never be able to enter the Heavenly Kingdom.

We must still prepare for this day even if it comes ten thousand years from now.

Since God is the original substance of true love, when we are connected to true love, we all become one. The parents represent God as a living God in their own right. 

Since God is the origin of true love, if we all possess true love then we are connected and become one.  The parents represent God as a living God in their own right representing one aspect of God's divided nature.  The son's and daughters are seen as an additional God.

This family unit built by three generations through true love is the foundation to build the Kingdom of Heaven on earth.

If we do not establish this true standard within the context of the family, we will never realize the Kingdom of Heaven and go beyond Paradise.

The family is the center of the universe.

The perfection of the universe depends on the perfection of the family.  Then, if you love in the universe just as you love in the family, you will be able to travel freely anywhere in the universe.   God, in this case, stands at the center of all love as the parents of the entire universe.  This is the formula for the family.

The basis for an original, God-centered family includes all the love of men, women, sons, daughters, parents and God.

When you love your parents, your husband and your sons and daughters in this place of unity, it will be like living in the heavenly kingdom.  So where does this heavenly Kingdom start?

It starts in every family. It does not magically unfold somewhere else.  The heavenly kingdom is just the 3-D expansion of the family.

It is not outside the family.

When you think of embracing your spouse, you should think that you are a man and a woman becoming one on behalf of the world.

The family is the place where you substantiate your love for humankind through action. 

We should have respect for our own flesh and blood and respect our parents and grandparents as the owners of our house who represent the heavenly right of kingship.  But we despise them because they are old.

There is the old saying the "generation gap" that has created a division between the different generations of the family.  Did God invent such a word?  No, Satan created this word.  Can love dwell in this phrase "generation gap"?

Do we live the way people lived within a family a thousand years ago?  Was there a different way to love then?  The ways are the same and the means of loving are the same.  What has changed are the inner aspects.

If we had not Fallen, the formula for love would have remained unchanged for a hundred million years.  Even if Heaven turns upside down as long as the three generations of grandparents, parents and children strongly unite the same as an iron fortress, then they will be able to bring about the heavenly kingdom anywhere they go.

The fundamental source for the seed of God's love and the seed of life is this lineage. 

If we cannot establish this, then there will be no hope for the heavenly kingdom on earth, the heavenly kingdom of peace or the world of happiness and freedom.

We talk about paradise or the heavenly kingdom, but it is not a place you can go alone. How much peace can you have if your husband is in hell and you are in paradise?

If you have seen the movie "What Dreams May Come", you see it illustrates this very point of a husband who went to hell to bring his suicidal wife to heaven and all of his children back together to live forever.

The Kingdom of Heaven is a place where you go together with your parents, brothers and sisters - your family.  First we learn how to live united in love on this horizontal plane.

What is the heavenly kingdom? You talk about going to paradise or the heavenly kingdom, but you cannot go alone. The Kingdom of Heaven is a place where you must go together with your parents and brothers and sisters. 

Return for Tomorrow's Post: We Come From One Root

Today's text was rewritten and derived from the Textbook: Cheon Seong Gyeong Book Three - True Love Chapter Four - Love and Family written by Dr. Rev. Sun Myung Moon.