What is the true position of a husband and wife? Is it like Leave it To Beaver where the husband works and the wife stays home with the children? Of course, women have moved far from the traditional roles that kept marriages stable and demand equality in their marriages.
"As love matures, sons and daughters are born as the fruit of love."
"For woman, her sexual organ is the holy place of love and only the husband has the key to the door of her love.
If the husband has two keys to open the holy place of love, he is Satan. The woman's holy place is to be opened only by her husband's key. If it can be opened by any other key, the woman is Satan.
When the husband opens the wife's holy place with his key of love, the most precious and valuable children are to be born. The children are the crystals of love. Through giving birth to a child, human beings can experience God's heart of having created Adam and Eve." Reverend Sun Myung Moon.
If a woman complains about the way her husband smells or if the husband doesn't like his wife's facial expression or gestures, it is easy to see that perfect love has not been established between the couple. Such couples relate centering upon their own advantage.
The Destiny Of A Couple
What is the deepest definition of marriage?
It is when a couple sets their sights upon a common destiny, to pursue the dual destiny and overcoming one's individual destiny. Once a man and a woman are bound to this common destiny through marriage, they cannot freely change it by their will.
"A man is bound to a man's destiny because he is born as a man; a woman is bound to a woman's destiny because she is born as a woman. No one can deviate from this; there is nothing that we can do about this destiny. Therefore, it is wise for us to follow the given orbit of destiny."
Once you are married, you cannot do whatever you like. You are to follow the destiny of your family at the risk of your life.
"When we extend the trajectory of the heartistic road that a man and a woman are to go, it converges in oneness, focused upon God's principled road. That is the ideal point of the settlement of family love, generated by the oneness of man and woman."
Before marriage, a man and woman should individually find the central point where they can settle themselves down in God's heart; then as a couple, they find the settling point of family love by extending their individual focus toward the family as a whole.
"Everybody's fortune is as different as everybody's face is different."
Everyone's destiny is different. If a husband's fortune is bad, the wife's good fortune can change his destiny toward good. The wife's bad fortune also can be made better by the good fortune of her husband. Therefore, the destiny of a couple is like leveling the land, raising up the valleys ad bringing down the mountains.
Upon this fertile ground centred on the couple's common ideals and a variety of plans for the land, they can plant trees or plow field. Thinking in this manner, the couple should not unite centering upon the other's external looks. When a couple marries, there is more at stake and can be fearful.
There is a principle that takes place even though we are not completely aware. If a marriage of a couple is not matched well or accomplished, either the man dies or the woman dies, or both of them die at the same time. You have seen this phenomena many times.
Just because your generation is enjoying prosperity, it does not guarantee that the future generation will enjoy the same. We see that as America was being raised, generations suffered in poverty and after World War II, the fruits of thousands of patriots sacrifice for this land made America one of the greatest countries in the world. But, America became complacent and after the 1960s with the 'free love' era, the generations have further lost their footing on what made America great.
"A minimum of three to seven generations should be settled centered upon God. Your spouse may seem unfit for you to your human eyes, but you will realize the truth after making effort to live together for more than three years. Father is teaching about history from the aspect of tradition, so you couples should endeavor to become one."
You are in the same position as Jesus and the Holy Spirit.
When you are centered on God and you invest your tears in saving others' lives, multiplication will surely take place. You should research whether this is true or not; if it is not true, than Father Sun Myung Moon must be a lie.
You should absolutely unite upon God's will at the risk of your life and for the sake of the glory of God's will and for the sake of your descendants. First establish a foundation where you can have give and take with God. Procreation begins when you completely engage in this give and take action. This is the Principle of Creation. Every household should practice this principled life. The fact that this standard is not practice by all, we have become stagnate in our way of life.
Unless you accomplish relational love first, you cannot reach the absolute love of the subject. This destiny was given human beings in the original creation, so when you cannot accomplish the purpose of love, you are bound to bring about a rupture.
In order that you reach the absolute love of the subject, you must first relational love first. A husband should keep his promises. The husband's mind and body should be unchanging. Otherwise, when he passes on to spirit world, he will be judged, not by God, but his wife.
"The perfect person is the one who accomplishes oneness of mind and body, oneness with God, and oneness with their spouse. There is only one love. There is only one heartistic standard for a couple to establish."
The mind and body of a couple should be one. Love is eternal; It is one not two. When two physical bodies become one centering their lives on God's ideal and establish the four-position foundation of love (parent-child, husband-wife, brother-sister, God-man) this is the beginning of the ideal world. Satanic false love cannot invade there, only true love will dwell there.
Those who complain about their spouses after God has walked a painful and sorrowful path to bring about such a spouse, they do not know how God is headed toward establishing the Kingdom of Heaven on Earth through the love of your spouse.
God understands the differences in standards that you and your spouse have.
When a spouse is not satisfied with you, if you keep a grateful heart to God for giving you such a blessing, He will bless you abundantly in the near future. A grateful heart is the absolute condition for receiving God's blessing. We must all be the ones with this kind of heart.
The first three years is a hard time for spouses as they engraft to one another. Differences in family backgrounds, habits, and etiquette do not fit one another, but both spouses should make a determined effort to fit together.
It is the husband's responsibility to increase his wife's willingness to be supportive and obedient to him. Through the husband's relations with his wife, he will teach her substantially how the Principle works centered on God. This is why Father Moon teaches that the first three years of married life discipline the couple to learn how to be united with God's will and ideal.
"Give birth to a child after being a parent without any trace of shame, according to God's will and the Principle. Such a family life is the principled form."
Reverend Sun Myung Moon, tells his congregation how a woman's standard of love should surpass her husband's mistake:"It is not easy to play the role of a parent; neither is it easy to play the role of a husband or a wife. You have to inherit the tradition set by the Completed Testament age of the Principle.
Everything that a woman possess God made to belong to others, so it is the woman's responsibility to keep others' belongings well. When we think in this context of a woman's breasts, hips and her sexual organs, we see that none of these were made for woman's sake.
A woman is in the position of a guest, an errand girl and a servant. She enters the other's house as a servant, goes through the course of an errand girl for her husband and parents-in-law, and finally becomes a queen -- the most precious guest.
Originally, a woman's voice should sound softer than the voice of an average man. Her voice should be like the whispers of love.
In an Oriental family, the husband even hits his wife to correct her bad habits. An American woman divorces right away if she gets even one fist from her husband, doesn't she? What kind of love is that, which can be abandoned because of one blow?
If she is slapped by her husband, a woman with true love weeps, holding her husband's hands. What can you do with love so shallow that it runs away because of one slap? True love makes you risk your life. A woman of true love doesn't abandon her husband even though he does this. I want to make you such a woman. But you know it is really not good for a husband to hit his wife.
What kind of woman do you want to be ? Do you want to be the kind of woman who divorces after being slapped by her husband? Don't you all want to be the women of true love, who can love sacrificing their lives in spite of your husband's misbehavior? Raise your hand if you want to be such a woman. All of the American men want to get married to you if you are such a woman.
What kind of bond do we have? We have the bond which will avenge God's lost love.
In order to make a bond of life, a man and a woman should march forward toward world peace. Peace cannot be achieved by only a man or only a woman. It is to be accomplished by the unified power of a man and woman. The way to achieve unity and peace is to rush right into the center. The driving force to rush into the center is the power of love. When your object appears, your mind automatically is to be stimulated to love.
When you are in suffocating agony, nobody can help you get out of that state. Even God cannot do anything for you. But how precious it is to have a horizontal partner who can understand your heart! The partner's shortcomings can be the condition for you to be grateful to God and to mitigate God's burden. When your partner comes up short in every helm of life, it can be a good condition for you to show yourself in front of God.
Individual destruction is acceptable but the family shouldn't be destroyed. The wife is the most needed person in the world for her husband and the husband is the most needed person in the world for his wife. You should be each other's walking stick, advising each other.
Whether your partner is good or bad, he or she is your partner. When a husband faces the fate of death, so does his wife. The wife who curses her husband when he is on the verge of death will surely perish. The same applies to the husband.
The subject or object who lives for the sake of his or her partner never perishes. When there is a perfect subject who lives for the sake of others, a perfect object is bound to appear. When there is a perfect object who practices life for the sake of others, a perfect subject will definitely appear. Even though the partner doesn't appear right away, if you don't give up until the end, he or she definitely will come.
You have to know this point very clearly. You shouldn't give things up so easily after trying just several days. Once you start something, your mind should determine to persist until death. If you cannot get the direct result in your lifetime, your mind should believe that it will surely come in the following generations.
Waiting for generation after generation is not bad, if it is the result of God's plan to give you the worldwide blessing. God will think, 'You are a very patient tribe, so wait for ten or twenty generations more. I'll pour the worldwide, historical blessing upon your descendants.'"
Return for Tomorrow's Post: Why God Made Men/Women Opposites
This post was rewritten and based on the Principle written by Dr. Rev. Sun Myung Moon, Textbook: Blessing and Ideal Family, The True Husband and Wife Ideal Family
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