Ideal True Husband and Wife

"Why did God make it that man needs woman and woman needs man? It is because God did not want to let one person live independently, but desired that two people live together for the sake of the future world, centering upon God's desire and love."

Youngsters today would be shocked to visit the past where marriages were more stable and even through the arguments and pain, couples vowed to stick it out until death.  If society returns to the time where God was served at the center of the family, many current trends and problems would be erased quickly within a generation.

An ideal couple that is united living hand in hand, dreaming optimistically about the future while denying the fallen world will be able to pass over any difficult environment or reality.  This husband and wife will not be destroyed or restrained by the evil environment, but it stimulate in them a new vision for the future.

When a man and a woman stand in the position to respect each other, fully aware of and accompanied by the value of the future, the site of happiness will be established right there.

God established Adam and Eve as each other's ideal spouse because they are absolutely needed for each other. Unless the subject and the object make a bond of affinity in the present reality they cannot relate to the future. God established Jesus and the Holy Spirit as subject and object in order to manifest this cosmic content. Nobody can deny this.

Based on a unity between subject and object, they get married to extend the dominion.

A couple's affection generated from one another is extended to establish a family matching God's purpose.  If a couple is not able to do so, they cannot enter the Kingdom of Heaven where God dwells in eternity.  This is the conclusion and God's purpose of creation.

God and human beings are composed of dual characteristics.  God is in the vertical position and man is in the horizontal.  God's ideal of husband and wife is to create a perfect sphere of give and take of unity of the vertical God and the horizontal human beings.

"Husband and wife should love each other as God's representatives. If you love from a humanistic point of view, you will eventually get divorced after discovering each other's shortcomings."

When a man and woman divorce because one of them make a mistake, the whole family system is destroyed which spreads upward affecting the order of society being thrown into confusion.

How can a family affect the whole?  A nation is made of people.  All people learn to love within the context of a family unit.  The direction the American family is headed can be turn around.  When a spouse makes a mistake, according to the degree of the indiscretion, they should be given a time period of indemnity or retribution to pay back through repentance.  This way, they can continue to run as a harmonious family unit.

Who are the true husband and true wife?  Hollywood stars?  Kings and Queens of foreign places?

When people become mature, they learn to form a family.  The Reverend Sun Myung Moon who was married 50 years to his wife Rev. Hak Ja Han Moon continues this speech to his congregation:

"Each spouse should consider the other as the eternal object of love.  When this is observed, their love should grow, day by day adding more love to the first love.  When a husband and wife extend this eternal love to the family-level love, then to the tribe, they can be considered a true husband and true wife.  Then they qualify to participate in God's high level of pure love.

The true husband thinks that he was born, lives, and will die for the sake of his spouse. The same is true for the true wife. The husband and wife of an ideal, happy and peaceful family carry the principle to live for the sake of their spouse.

All of you are men of influence and fame in your society. You may think that your success is achieved by your own talent and effort, but you have to know that your very being was caused by a woman, not by yourself.

Without a woman, can a man be born? What about a woman? Was she born for the sake of herself?

It is vanity to be proud of being a famous feminine movie star in colorful make-up without a man. A man's shoulders are wide and a woman's hips are big so that they can be matched well.

Therefore, an ideal couple comes into being when they are of one mind to live for the sake of the other. From this point of view, ideal, happy and good people are those who live for the sake of others. This is the very principle of creation, of which humankind is still ignorant.

The husband should be able to sacrifice his life for the sake of his wife and the wife should be able to sacrifice her life for the sake of her husband. Such a couple is related to and protected by God's direct dominion of love, so it is impossible for them to fall.

True parents live and die for the sake of their children because love is established between them. Likewise, a husband and wife of true love and of true happiness are one in love, and they each live for the sake of the other.

This is an ideal couple.

In the secular family, when a husband earns money, power is produced. The money earned by the husband is the source to energize the wife and the husband gets energy by looking at his energized wife. That's why they are anxious and their relationship is apt to be broken when the husband doesn't earn money.

The true husband and wife should center upon God's love.

The bride and bridegroom should center upon the original love of God, not upon money, authority or fame.

You are to develop yourself gradually, centering upon love. While the husband loves the wife and the wife lives for the sake of the husband, they are to establish a family that loves God.

In the secular family, when a husband earns money, power is produced. The money earned by the husband is the source to energize the wife and the husband gets energy by looking at his energized wife. That's why they are anxious and their relationship is apt to be broken when the husband doesn't earn money.

The true husband and wife should center upon God's love. The bride and bridegroom should center upon the original love of God, not upon money, authority or fame.

You are to develop yourself gradually, centering upon love. While the husband loves the wife and the wife lives for the sake of the husband, they are to establish a family that loves God.

What is the ideal couple of which the Unification Church talks? They are the couple which can substantiate the utmost art. The love of a husband and wife is the masterpiece of all art works. It is the best literature and it should be the substance of literature.

The husband should look the best in the wife's eyes and the wife should look the best in the husband's eyes. The bond of first love is the best bond. It doesn't matter what others say. It is impossible to buy it with billions of dollars. How beautiful it is to possess such a world of love eternally!

The wife should follow and serve her husband well. This is not supposed to appear just in literature or movies. You should live it in reality. The ideal of history and the ideal of culture have been wrecked, so Father has been creating a new history in order to create the ideal culture.


Love Husband and Wife Eternally

Until when do you want to love your spouse? How would you feel if the answer came, "Until our youth is over" ?

We want our spouse to love us until death and even eternally. Eternity represents the whole centering upon the future. To love until death is to love sacrificing everything. "Eternally" means "completely," and "until death" means "giving everything."

After marriage, sisters will ask their husbands if they like them and how much they like them. They want to hear their husbands say that they love them giving everything, wholeheartedly. The same is true for men. It is inevitable. It is the way of God's harmony.

A man should die if he cannot control a woman, but it doesn't mean that man is to neglect woman. It doesn't work to claim and to present your one-sided way of love. Man and woman should examine each other forever. If your life is not sanctified and your family is not restored, God cannot claim your couple as His.

The dutiful son's mind is unchanging and it goes straight to his parents; and the loyal subject's mind goes straight to his king. Likewise, the saint is the one whose mind is unchanging and goes straight to God. If your mind is unchanging even at the moment of death, you are a dutiful son, a loyal subject and a saint.

In this view, if a couple wants to be a true husband and wife, the wife's mind should be able to go straight to the husband and the husband's mind should be able to go straight to the wife. That's why the Unification Church disciplines the mind to go straight to God regardless of whether one is Occidental or Oriental. Therefore, the mind of western members and of eastern members in the Unification Church is exactly the same toward Father.

The husband is precious to his wife and the wife is precious to her husband. They meet in the presence of the heavenly law; their meeting is not caused by themselves. If we keep our integrity in relation to God, we can break through and advance upon our way."


Return for Tomorrow's Post: Original Relationship of Husband, Wife in Perfect World

Textbook: Blessing and Ideal Family, The True Husband and Wife and The Ideal Family