How to Be Grateful for the Little Things

Now summer is here and all of nature is ready. When you come to Belvedere you might look at that one big tree outside here and remark at how big a tree it is.

When you go outside, you will see that some trees will have a special characteristic that will catch your attention, Especially if one is tall and has colorful leaves.  Even in nature, it is hard to find an object that is perfectly beautiful.  It takes a lot of catering and arrangement to create and present beauty.

There is manmade beauty and natural beauty, but beauty created in the natural way is more difficult. 

Even though an oak tree is big, it started from a small acorn.

Over the years that it grew, it had to absorb many elements.  In its growth it took many sacrifices and contributions.

There is an absolute necessary element that the tree needs to do before it can command respect as a great tree.

I must realize that there were several circumstances and elements combined to make its success possible.

It is a heartistic necessity to recognize and bow down to these elements which made it great.  Both internal and external elements made great sacrifices to make just that one tree.

When the tree is grateful and humble before the elements which made him great, those elements would have respect for him knowing his position and then will gladly give more of themselves.

The small blades of grass that reside in the tree's shade would not be able to complain that the tree receives all of the sun light, but would decide to live with the inconvenience because the tree was grateful.

What if the sun decided to stop shining on the tree?

Would the tree still be in the position to be proud and great or would he become worried and anxious how he would survive without the sun?

What if the air stopped existing or any more water?  How would the tree react?

This situation is just an analogy for man's relationships.

Should you walk pridefully and think that you don't need anybody and you exist independently?  Or would you be meek enough to thank the sun and the air for sustaining your existence?

You eat food with your mouth and at the same time your skin is "breathing" sunlight; which is more delicious?

Let us think in a different way.  You may think that you taste with your mouth but without the sun, your eyes would not even be necessary.

Without the air, you would no longer need your nose.  Therefore, without the air, how would soundwaves travel?  Without soundwaves, your ears would not be necessary.

Your mouth sacrifices many things from the outside for your survival.

Can you then be proud?  Where did your arms and legs come from?  They come from your parents and belong to them in reality.  When each of you was in your mother's womb, you stole energy from her as you grew.

When you go to the store, whatever you buy, you receive a receipt, but did you get a small receipt from all of the energy your mother gave you?  This is why you are thieves!

Can you truly say your body belongs to you?

Day and night you kicked and poked your mother, but you never apologized.  Did you complain or did you have gratitude while you were in your mother's womb?  After nine months of acting up in your mother, you were born.

But you still took nourishment and energy as she fed you.

When you were a little older, you were then fed complete meals by others.  Can we still proclaim our bodies truly belong to us and owe no one?  You never earned it.

Americans are prompt to say thank you, but how much more do you owe thanks to your parents who gave birth to you and attended to you while you grew?

If you were a restless or cranky baby and cried all of the time and demanded attention, you parents didn't demand you to stop, they would immediately comfort you.

Then when you became of age, you attended school for education.  Your parents in totality take care of you for 18 years.

When you think deeply about these things, then you know that you are indebted to your parents for your well-being.  Have you ever told your parents how much they served you or gave and terms of dollars.

The debt is so great, you would never be able to pay them back.

American teenagers act sometimes as if their parents magically appeared out of the heavens.  They speak about the gap between the generations, and that they came into being without causing any trouble to anyone.

Many times young people think their parents just bother them and they place them in retirement homes with an attitude that no one needs the elderly.

The universe does not work in this way.

The world must harmonize.

A person never parallels the universal way when they claim things for his own selfish benefit and demand his rights.  

It is a law of nature that while you are growing up, you are deeply indebted to your parents, and after you are grown and responsible then you repay that debt by taking care of your parents.

When you take a look into the past, what is it that you can be proud of?

You can be proud that you are indebted to your father and mother recognizing that you are also indebted to nature.  You would show appreciation for the water, sun and air, because without these elements you could not even survive for five minutes.

We must be thankful for the world of plants and the animal kingdom.

When you pass a pasture, what is the first thing you think when you see a cow?  That she is fat and that she would make good steaks?  You would probably think of food first instead of thanking the cow.

Which person would the cow welcome: the person who thought of him as a potential steak, or the one who shows gratitude toward him?

Even a cow would rather be eaten by a gracious person instead of a greedy person.

God looks down at this self-centered kind of thinking and knows that He did not create this world for man's self-serving needs.

Do you think that your clothes belong to you?  What about the jewelry you wear?

When a person is proud and thinks that they are independent from others and their environment, nature would laugh at such a person.  Nature knows that you could never exist by yourself.

The universe would never show any gratitude toward the person does not observe any thankfulness.  Everyone has something to be thankful for in their life from the moment of their birth.

If there is a person that understands how much they are indebted to nature, parents, the world and knows his position the world gladly harmonizes with him.

What if you lived in the desert and all the sudden woke up to find that a tropical environment was being created before you in your presence.  How much gratitude would you feel then?

Wouldn't you shout for happiness if all of this appeared out of nowhere one day?  Would you take the world of nature for granted after experiencing the wasteland just beforehand?

Have you ever thought that there was a day where nothing was in existence, that time before God brought anything into existence?  God said that everything was good when creation was complete, but what if you as His child took more pleasure and enjoyment in each thing that He did?

Would He gladly appreciate your expression or not?

God has existed from the beginning, so He would remember and appreciate you based on the historical perspective of millions of years.  Would God say with your kind of heart that it was just good, or would He remember and appreciate you within His heart?

He would think that you were better than anyone in all of history for having so much gratitude for His work.

What if this type of person was not so valued in the looks department or was crippled?  Would God appreciate them less?

No, this person would be remembered first in God's heart.

What about you, what is you first impression when you look in the mirror every morning?

Many women will shun looking in the mirror or have their picture taken.  But no matter how you look, you should view yourself in the broader perspective in which God sees us.

Each of us sends out waves or vibrations to the universe and the world can communicate with you through them. 

What kind of vibes would a person who appreciate everything send?

What about people who always complain and use people for their own advantage?  This kind of person would repel everything in the universe because of that vibration.

The person who is always negative and dissatisfied with everything in site, bites everything including friends and family.

A dissatisfied personality always has long nails everywhere around their body to bite or scratch the universe.  Doesn't it feel that way when you are around such a person?

Today there are definitely a great many people that live in such an unhappy state.

What about your heart?

On the other hand, when you realize your position toward your neighbors and relatives, you feel gratitude.  Then instead of biting and scratching others, you only reach out to embrace them all.

This way, you are sending out infinite waves of gratitude out to all corners of the earth.

The ocean is wide, but it could not be greater than your mind of gratitude. 

Your mind can be strong if you make it small, but if you make it large then it is larger than any ocean on earth!

In that case, the entire universe embraces you also with that quality of mind.    

We each have millions of individual cells in our bodies that are similar to employees in a corporation.  Each of these cells send out their own waves which all of nature responds.

Whatever vibe you send out, is how nature will echo you.

What kind of person do you want to be like: the kind that has infinite appreciation, or one that always has infinite disappointment and complaint?

This is why the Bible teaches to always have gratitude, as well as humbleness and meekness.

Can you count how many words you have used in your life up to this point?  Can you measure what portion has been dedicated to speaking gratitude or for complaint?

We have a general tendency to complain, so most people would receive the sign, "I am a complainer."  Don't you think this is the life most people lead?

But when you complain then everything in the universe is repelled by you. 

Even your parents and friends wouldn't want to be around you if you complain all the time.

Would God be happy to hear it?  Are your eyes, nose and ears complaining about the information that comes to them or are they appreciative in what they see, hear and smell?

If your body and mind are always full of complaint, who will welcome you?  Not even your husband or fiancee, there is no exception.  No one likes to be around such negativity.

If you were to place bags holding your complaint or appreciation, which outweighs the other?

Are complainers usually good or bad people?  You don't like to hear this kind of judgement do you?:

But don't you think that evil-minded people also want to hear kind words from others?

Wouldn't nature also want to hear words of kindness and love, or would they tell you to stop?  Even your pet loves to have loving reinforcement when they do something good. Even the simple words, "Good boy" brings such excitement.

Does your balance tilt more on the complaint or gratitude side?

If you are below zero, then nothing will treat you like a human being because you would be substandard, at the animal level of interaction.



Return for Tomorrow's Post: Recreate the Ideal World

This post was rewritten and derived form the speech Reflection Upon Life

Qualitifications for Marriage

"When you are permitted by God to start your family, you are being permitted to begin working on your basic right to inherit the Kingdom of Heaven. In other words, that is the first step towards realizing the Kingdom of Heaven."

Today, we see many marriages do not last beyond a few years, but we do not hear much about the faithful marriages that last unto death.  As the world moved more toward the goal of materialism and individualism, a man and woman in marriage found it harder to stay together, but it is possible. 

In order to be married, one must have acquired the heart to love unconditionally and give unceasingly to their spouse.  We are living in a culture where each spouse wants to receive and not give.  Secondly, marriages without God at the center are doomed to fail without direction or hope of how to live as a true husband and wife.

God spent thousands of years to work through lineage to bring one man and woman together in order to restore the mistake of the first husband and wife. 

He originally intended for man and woman to join together absolutely centered on His ideal without the presence of the fall.  God in these last days has hope through the unity of a man and woman and their family, a world a peace will begin. 

When we look at the significance of marriage from God's point-of-view, should we look at our spouse and go, "I don't like the way he look," or "I wish he was more educated" or some sort of criticism?  This is selfish thinking when a couple has not given their marriage even three years to develop before giving up. 

A couple has many forces of oppositions from the moment they bring their different backgrounds and differences under one roof.  How can anyone dislike their spouse without even giving the relationship a try to connect?

In the Unification Church, individuals learn the teachings of the Divine Principle, the Completed Testament, and align their lives toward God's vision of restoring man.  The founder of the church, as God's representative, matches two individuals together in marriage.  Sometimes, members will have their own idea and characteristics of a spouse and insist on being matched to such a person.  This is a self-centered way of thinking and not for the purpose of the whole. 

Father Moon was never enthusiastic about matching such individuals together based on their taste alone, because they weren't assured to have normal, healthy children and have a long healthy life.  Lineage is more important than love.  Those who insisted strongly to be match to someone solely based on their own desires, oftentimes found one spouse or the other met an untimely death through accident or disease.

"Can you make your own happiness by yourself? No, you need someone who can help you. Who is that someone? That is the True Parents, the Divine Principle, the Heavenly world, and especially God."

We absolutely need God in the choosing of our spouse.  How do you truly know someone background, ancestry, their character or their past deeds?  Father Moon takes matching two individuals seriously and only with God's direct blessing, and has more knowledge about marriage and children.  He said he is more serious about his member's marriages than they are.

"When I tell you, "Such a marriage will not work," you may wonder how I can know. I have a special spiritual "antenna" which never fails. When I feel a match is bad, it is always bad. That is not because I want it to be bad; it is simply the truth." SMM

Your Own Ideal Family

Are you ready to create an ideal family?

The author of the Divine Principle said that if he had said something wrong to someone, it took seven months of intense effort and prayer to rectify that action and still the situation was never as good as before.

If just a few words could cause such intense damage, what about a wrong act of love?  It would take tens of thousands of years to restore that mistake.  This is why your marriage is the most awesome experience and at the same time the most fearful position to be in.  Do people think deeply about their marriage that this chance only comes once in hundreds of thousands of years?

A marriage blessed directly by God, when that couple goes out, will have the attention of all of spirit world and God's attention like an invisible limelight following them. 

We should not evaluate our spouse or others based on just superficial attributes or physical appearances.  The true ideal marriage is much deeper than these superficial qualities.   

By Heavenly standard, if we already are thinking about kissing each other, we have the mouth of a thief.  When we look at our spouse, we should see them with ideal eyes and have a pure spiritually elevated feeling toward our spouse.  The wedding ceremony is really a place of great judgment.  If you and your spouse make a good foundation for your marriage, then you will receive Heavenly reward.

If your marriage makes a bad foundation, it is irreversible and you will make hell for yourself.  Some people when they find this out feel overwhelmed as the wedding approaches and ask, "What should I do?"

"One thing you can do is to have complete trust in the words I have spoken. Receive those words as your protection and your supervision. If you try to live in accordance with those words for your life, you can be confident about the future. If you resolve not to waver or look back you can have confidence."

Father Moon advises to pledge to God one thing:

"Father, whatever the difficulties may be in the future, I know that my best friend and best helper is my spouse. I will never let go of him, even if he kicks me. It is out of the question to ever disown him."  You should pledge this to God above all else. If you do not do this, you may get married but you may not bear the best fruit.

After you have pledged to never give up on your spouse as your best support, your children will remind you of your past mistakes if you ever transgress on your promise. If you are to divorce, after knowing the quality of marriage how guilty would you feel for the rest o your life? Your own heart, body and spirit will judge and curse you more than anyone else.

Before your marriage, you should set your mind to do well and not make a mistake so goodness will come to you.  When problems arise, we should not look at other people and find fault with them.  Instead we should look within ourselves.

People will respect you, your spouse will respect you and will be inspired to love you.  When a husband respects his wife and treats her well, she will be inspired to be obedient to him because this is the Heavenly standard of marriage which God created.

This text explains why how external appearance alone does not constitute who a person truly is.  If one can attest that they are completely perfect in heart and spirit centered on God, than they are qualified to choose any spouse they wish and criticize their spouse in any way they wish.

"In the Bible there is a very graphic illustration of this point. Jesus came upon a crowd preparing to stone to death a woman caught in immorality, according to the law of the time. Before they killed her they asked Jesus his opinion about the situation.

At first he just bent down and wrote with his finger in the sand, pretending to ignore them. However, the people pressed him to answer and he told them that those people who were free of sin should throw the first stones. One by one, the crowd dispersed until there was no one there except the accused woman who bowed down to Jesus."

What about you and me?  Are we better than these people?  Some women will criticize others, but refuse to be criticized.  Each women represent all womenkind, so if you treat your spouse unjustly, no one will know, but women in spirit world will know and accuse you deeply.  The same is true for men.

We must understand the true meaning of marriage. 

"According to the maturity and genuineness of your love, the real blessings of life will come to you."

A couple that has the understanding of the precious era in which we live and are truly grateful for everything that comes to them will receive the deepest blessing in life.  If you endure great difficulties in life without taking a break, yet  you still feel gratitude to God, He would like to be nowhere else but with you to give His blessing to your family.

Blessing goes to those who are grateful in every situation even the difficult ones.

"Sometimes I give money to someone in order to see how he will spend it. I always respect the person who carefully uses his money and saves as much as he can to use for the best purpose. Some people just spend money without thinking."

To establish a tradition, you need to have three generations observing it, grandparents, parents, and children.

It is more valuable to be grateful toward God in a bitter situation than when receiving a lot of blessing which anybody can be grateful then.

Usually people pray to have the best husband or wife, but the one who prays, "I will be satisfied with anyone You give to me, because I will help her to be the best woman in the world."  This type of person will receive the best and most handsomest spouse.

That is the principle.

We must remember how much God labored and how our spouse is the fruit of a long and complex history.  One should not say, "I don't like him or her".  Even God does not reject anyone.  What makes us so great to be above God himself with our own wild tastes and preferences?

Haven't we seen the disastrous results from choosing our own mates based on our own selfish desires?  We should consult God in our marriage. We should digest all the bad points of our spouse and not just enjoy their good points.  Whatever these points are, we should learn to love him or her.

Return for Tomorrow's Post: Before and After the Marriage Ceremony

This text was rewritten and taken from the Speech; Ideal Family, Ideal World